What's on my mind?, What's on my thoughts?

                   

As I open this new post I ask myself what's on my mind? what are my thoughts?

                There’s nothing wrong with having knowledge and power as long as it is beneficial to all mankind, not rooted in greedy and personal selfish interests. Having a brain is a gift from God to people to be used to think about what is right and wrong. I agree that when a man enjoys having his creative powers may lead to potential destruction unless there is wisdom from God above or higher being and it could give a good benefit to all. What the mind goes the body will follow, so whatever the desire of the person might be the reflection of his or her attitudes and values.

            I believe that it is essential for a person to commit a mistake and let the human learn from their own experience so that it would fill into their being and own realization that committing a mistake is not stupidity but a chance to be improved as a person. Indeed, the feeling of emptiness also has a purpose to be filled in. Some say, “it is wiser to learn from the mistake of others” but again an experienced felt from the heart and soul could drive change for the person and can change self and be able to inspire others to change too. 

                 People may have different ways and different expressions of love. I agree that love is not enough to live here in this world. There must be understanding, compromise, and sacrifice which cannot be seen as a sacrifice, but a joy. There must be a purpose on why a person lives here in this world as a motivational force. I believe that I myself should have meaning in what I do. This kind of job that I have is a choice as I find it noble and makes me realize that my existence in this world is worth the while. 

                Some people may perceived that you are great but the thing is they do not know what you have gone through. All they know is the outer look or persona that you wear every day. They do not care to ask you if you are okay and if some did ask but you just don't want to respond authentically, not ready to dig in more of the real emotions, too much cultivation and so hectic to deal with (repression - a motivated forgetting, unconsciously). It is also a hint that some people were interested in you, or sometimes you are not interested to connect with them or sometimes you are the ones that is out of the connection. Sometimes we will meet a stranger thinking if that stranger will be with us, on our journey in life or for the rest of our lives. 

                Sometimes even in evaluating thy self I tend to ask what’s bothering you inside? what haunts you, self?. When there were so many things that I could think or make. I was suddenly in a stance to think or doubt myself made me pause and ask this question.. "I am strong?', "can I do it?" . But then , I realized....the truth is, I am at 0% capacity and the only thing that I am clinging to is to our God Almighty, thinking without Him , I am nothing!

                 It is true that self and society are interconnected. If I would like to change society it must be started within me. I read a passage about "If you want to change the world, go home and love your family". This is kind of bugling, issues within the self and family is crippling to discuss and sometimes hard to fathom but as long as we could just live by. continuously and have a deeper understanding and able to be more gentle and tender with one another we could still be at peace without even forcing to discuss the "big elephant", within the family. I should strive to become emotionally stable or stable in all aspects so that I am able to help others, if not yet for the self fully , because I believe in helping others could slowly begin to help me cope with my own issues. I should be more responsible (no pressure self!) for my own attitude, behavior, and values, before becoming an agent of change to society.  These are in my thoughts right now... wanted to impart the society to live and make this world a better place, despite my own defects and circumstance--  a functional imperfect human being! soon hoping to become a healed healer (yes easier said than done, but at least hoping). 

                Self-respect is so much important for me regardless the gain of the respect from others. I am glad that I am reaching the point to not please everyone and seek to their approval. I am tired pleasing everyone without looking into my own depths. 

            What is important to me right now is that I have already accepted Jesus in my heart and He may live in me. Random question to the self before "What do you want to become when you grow up?".. Here's my revised answer from my previous answer to become either dentist or writer. 

          When I grow up, I want to become happy, this is my ultimate goal in life, letting people know that I am their friend. It made me realized when I knew the qualities of Jesus Christ, He used to help other people. He doesn’t choose anyone as being with Him, He is fair to all and exempts no one to be called as His friend. So much thankful for knowing and understanding Him. May He will always be my model of doing things that could always please Him. What a humbling feeling that I as human not perfect could possibly change to become good -- never better, yet and may live to give ripple effect to other people. For some, I hope they got model, created themselves if they don't believe in divine human like Jesus, at least to the higher self or vibration.